By Chloe Chapman
Last weekend, the fellows had our first big deadline for one of our seminary classes: a paper on the book of Daniel and its implications for living and working in faith—eight to ten pages. Despite having nearly a month to write the paper, I procrastinated and allowed myself distraction after distraction, and I found myself doing the bulk of the work in a twelve-hour writing dash on Saturday—fueled by caffeine, a “Classical Focus” playlist on Spotify, and a timer to keep me on task. I have always said that I work better under the threat of a looming deadline, and while it is true that I am certainly more efficient under these conditions, I know that the work I do is not as good.
I have been reflecting a lot on distraction recently. Distraction seems to find its way into every little corner of my life, including the time I spend in prayer and God’s Word. I have tried several times to “hack” my distracted mind—by drawing up detailed schedules, setting phone reminders and screen time restrictions, and just generally trying to form good habits. These methods will work for a little while, but I inevitably fall back into my old habits of reading a book or watching a show instead of doing the work that I ought to be doing. I want to do my work well and on time, and I desire to spend consistent time in God’s Word, but I lack the self-control to keep good habits. There are many times when I feel actually trapped inside of my distracted mind. “For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing” (Romans 7:19 ESV).
As I fail, time and time again, to solve my problems by myself, God has been reminding me where I should be seeking my strength. Without Christ, I am a slave to my distractions and lack of self-control. No matter how many tools and how much willpower I use, I cannot free myself from it—but there is a better hope. “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death” (Romans 8:1-2 ESV). We have a new freedom to walk according to the Spirit instead of according to our flesh. Being distracted and finding it hard to form habits may very well be lifelong struggles for me, but these struggles are not ultimate—and the Holy Spirit helps me in my weakness.
Chloe Chapman is a member of the Capital Fellows class of 2024-25. She is from Vancouver, WA, and is a graduate of the University of Washington. This year, she is working at CCCU Government Relations in Ballston, VA.
Pictures From The Week
Movie night at Will's house!
Will and Virginia monkeying around after Cornerstone
Fellows sleepover at Chloe's house during the National Fellows Conference - getting ready to watch the Incredibles!
Dasha rocking a Martin Luther wig from our Reformation Day "group costume"
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